When I started writing this it was actually still August. Last night I had a dream that it started snowing. A little back story; I am not a cold-weather person. I am in fact, adverse to all things winter including skiing. It does not mean I can’t party with slow-cooker stews, hot coco around the fire-place, Christmas cookies, family holidays, etc. It just the rest that really gets me down. The rest meaning howling winds whipping against the windows and the 5 hours of shoveling prior to every trip to the grocery store.
I know these twinges of fear are irrational on the first day of September, however the leaves are beginning to turn and the air smells like fall. I’m already imagining hunkering down for the long dark months that have turned us New Englanders into such bitter warriors, going to war against the elements for six months out of the year. I’m not ready for this battle.
And my biggest concern? How am I going to keep my passion for Pilates alive when all I want to do is eat beef stew and drink brown liquor, preferably in bed?
I, like many I’m sure, rely on external influences to keep my motivation alive. It’s a bad habit I know, but it is so easy in the summer to just frolic in the sunshine and watch the productivity just happen around you. I look forward all year to jogging down the sun-dappled sidewalk, creating works of art, and having dinner parties. When it ends I hunt around for the little joys that give me that spark of inspiration, and they are few and far between.
It’s a little bit like this; We see an image of a cracking fireplace and a happy group huddled, laughing in front of it. How could winter be so bad with the fluffy socks and the warm fire and the tea and pretty white snow? What this image isn’t showing is the hour before hand, when the fire wasn’t lit and the door was frozen shut. Stanlee (the little doggy) and Stella (the other little doggy) partially emerging from a heap of everything blanket-like they could drag into a corner, howling sadly (yes we have heat, don’t worry).
I am worried that I won’t be able to continue what I have started because of something as un-preventable as the weather. Which is ridiculous. If I learned anything in my brief career as a sales agent, it is that you must always be responsible for motivating yourself. Be able to get excited about the things you dread most. To a lucky few I think this comes naturally, The rest of us must work very hard to see the cup half full when things are full of snow.
I, as the self-elected leader of the cup-half empty-ers, vow to change things this year. The sunlight that originally had me motivated in my endeavors will not be by downfall when it goes into hibernation.